Daughters Graduation & Guests

First I am so glad my wife found this site for both of us!

We both are so very proud of her and her courageous decision to join the Navy!

I am completely torn right now. We received her box of belongings a week after she left and a few days later we received the form letter that gave us her address and the names of the people she has chosen to attend her graduation.

My heart is broken because she did not choose my wife (her stepmother) as one of the 4 to attend PIR. I do not know if there is anything that we can do so that she can see her graduate in person and not by live feed. My wife has done so much for her and raised her as if she was her own since she was 4 years old. My wife was extremely heartbroken with this choice (which we believe was influenced by her mother), but is persistent that I attend her graduation, and has already booked the flights and hotel. I don't want to miss it but I feel guilty that I get to see it and she doesn't. Does anyone have any idea if there can be something done for my wife to be able to attend?

Thank you!

Alvin aka: Bubba

I'm sorry for your situation. The Recruit Training Center's policy is to have visitors who are not on the access list go to the chapel, which is used as an overflow area. They show the live feed of the PIR in the chapel, but also warn you that they cannot guarantee the feed. I was too skeptical to transport extras from Virginia to Great Lakes without a guarantee (plus our sailor's A school is much closer to our home) Maybe others who've attended PIR can speak on the experience of going to the chapel to view the PIR.

Obviously this is much more about the family dynamic than about the PIR. I also raised daughters who were legally stepdaughters. Unfortunately, I suspect this isn't the first such conflict you've experienced. If the parents/step-parents can be mature, you can still gather together to spend time with your daughter during her post-PIR liberty. Best wishes.

Replies

John Alan DeMarco September 20, 2016 at 10:32pm

Pray Alvin. When she calls you on the I am a sailor call, ask her if she has thought about her step mom attending and if so she can change it then. Ultimately though support her decision.
Donald Averett September 1, 2016 at 1:57pm

I'm sorry for your situation. The Recruit Training Center's policy is to have visitors who are not on the access list go to the chapel, which is used as an overflow area. They show the live feed of the PIR in the chapel, but also warn you that they cannot guarantee the feed. I was too skeptical to transport extras from Virginia to Great Lakes without a guarantee (plus our sailor's A school is much closer to our home) Maybe others who've attended PIR can speak on the experience of going to the chapel to view the PIR.

Obviously this is much more about the family dynamic than about the PIR. I also raised daughters who were legally stepdaughters. Unfortunately, I suspect this isn't the first such conflict you've experienced. If the parents/step-parents can be mature, you can still gather together to spend time with your daughter during her post-PIR liberty. Best wishes.
NavyDads CoAdmin Jim Gramza August 30, 2016 at 6:05am

I'm sorry, but there is nothing you can do. Only your daughter can change the list of who gets into the drill hall. Your wife can still go with you, but she should just watch it on the feed at the hotel. If you don't have a laptop you can take, the Navy Lodge shows it on a large TV in their lobby.

I'm sorry you're going through this. But it's also pretty tough on your daughter as I'm sure she had some tough choices to make.

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