The responses
So far the feedback I have received to my thoughts has been mixed. Here is the funny thing. The mixed responses I am reading are not between posts but within posts. Put in another way Joes comment does not conflict with Jims, rather Joes conflicts with Joes. For example, The response generally starts off with me being selfish, then concludes by saying some of these things are not easy.
I have had no one in my immediate life go through this. This lifestyle is completely foreign to me. I work In a place where everyone comes home from work, and their families sit down for dinner. No one. Men, nor women have spouses living, and working in other places.
I am no less comforted by the fact that on military family support websites there are no men in my situation. There are plenty of girlfriends needing to cope but no men. I saw a couple comments from members on this site asking what to expect. Those were from over a year ago, and those members no longer seems to be active. If the relationship lasted I suspect there would have been some type of follow ups.
This is hard. I realize I focus on my needs, in a union we must share cognizance of each other’s needs. That is not unreasonable.
Am I asking what is right for us? No. Only we can decide that for ourselves. As for me I don’t know. I still seek others sharing their experiences to help me decide. Can this enrich our lives? Or is it just not for me?
Comments
She will be a Masters at Arms. Thank you for understanding my situation is unique. I am trying to be honest to those reading these, and honest with my self. The advice overwhelmingly is to get married and buy into the lifestyle. Can I do that? Marriage yes. The military lifestyle it will be a painful growth process. When I graduated high school I talked to a Coast Guard recruiter. With a baby on the way I decided working 2 jobs seven days a week I was sacrificing less than if I chose to serve. For me today the things the Military offers I do not need. I have a house, job, education, family. The one thing they do have that I am quite partial to is a 5 foot 1 sailor.
I have started counseling to help me cope with this. I am learning a lot through the posts I read online as well. Thank you so much for sharing your experiences.